Reader ,

What Makes Coaching Different?

A few weeks ago I was sitting with my coach. The topic of the day was how I could best support my wife Jan, whose older sister was recently diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. I already had some ideas and thoughts. I went into the session with confusion rather than clarity.

One of my "love languages" is acts of service. But that isn't Jan's primary language. And sometimes my acts of service weren't what she really needed. How do I show love and support in a way that Jan feels loved and supported?

I've got some amazing business opportunities on the horizon. But we're in a season of uncertainty where I need to be even more present at home. What should I do with these opportunities?

Finally, I have unexpected times where Jan is away serving her sister. How do I maximize those times rather than waste them?

Here's the amazing thing. Our coaching sessions normally last an hour, but just 20 minutes later I walked away with these insights:

• Regarding acts of service, pause and ask myself the question: "Are these actually helping? Or creating more disorder and stress?"
• For opportunities, to ask the question: "Is this opportunity worth pursuing in this season?"
• For times when Jan is away: "How is this an opportunity to recharge my own battery rather than default to projects, productivity, or escape?"

Twenty minutes from confusion to clarity. Those three questions now live on a sticky note in my Full Focus Planner. And the note moves from day-to-day so that I don't forget these powerful questions.

That’s the power of coaching.

A quick note -- you can tell if a coach really values coaching by asking a simple question: "Who coaches you?" I actually have three coaches: Tom, who I have known for twenty years; Carla, who I met in a coaching class we took together; and Max, the "human who coaches me on AI." (I used to say "my AI coach" but people thought I was using AI as my coach!)

At Edens View we have a value of "eating our own cooking." That means our team members receive external coaching from someone outside our organization. Otherwise saying we value coaching is just words on a web page.

The Third C of Effective Transformation is Coaching — and it’s not about someone giving you all the answers. It’s about having someone alongside you who:

• Notices what you can’t see
• Asks the questions you’d never think to ask yourself
• Challenges you when you’re tempted to settle for less
• Encourages you when you’re ready to give up

Looking back, I realize some of the most important breakthroughs in my life didn’t come from books, conferences, or podcasts. They came in those moments when a coach slowed me down long enough to think differently and helped me step forward with clarity.

Because coaching isn’t about fixing you. It’s about drawing out what’s already in you — and helping you live and lead with greater intention.

Meditation Moment

Recall a time when someone asked you a question that stayed with you long after the conversation ended. What change occurred from that moment and how has this impacted your life today?

My Next Action

Identify one area of life or leadership where you feel stuck.

• Invite someone you trust — a mentor, a peer, or a coach — to ask the questions you might be avoiding

I’m thankful for your time and trust, Reader. If you found this helpful or want to learn more about how Edens View can support you, contact us by replying directly to this email. With Anticipation, David Limiero